Friday, October 29, 2010


It's that time of year again. November is National Novel Writer's Month where oodles of people across the lands get together in cyberspace and commit to giving up a full month of their lives to pound out a 50,000 word novel. Sound like fun? Yeah, sounds a bit crazy to me too!! That's part of what makes it so fun.

This will be my third attempt at the challenge. I say "attempt" because I have yet to complete it. The first year I eeked out the first week feeling alone and ridiculous with the challenge. The second year I was a few weeks in but peetered out due to my inconsistency with writing and knowing it would be impossible to catch up.

In order to pass the 50,000 in 30 days you have to commit to writing every single day. You have to pump out about 1700 words per day!!! Imagine if you get behind. Two days behind and you already have to make up 3400 words plus the 1700 for the day you jumped back in. Yikes!!!

This year is a must for me! I actually added it to my 40 by 40 list (found in the right hand column). That's a commitment to me, by me. Aack! What was I thinking????

The problem I have with NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writer's Month) is letting go. It's kind of a theme for me. I like control, I'm a perfectionist and I'm not so good at just letting go. In order to complete the 50,000 words you really have to free flow your writing. Just write whatever comes into your head. Let it flow out without correction, overthinking or really much planning at all. Not the way I normally work. I like to over-think, over-plan, expect perfection. Damn, I sound like a prudish bore! Hence the reason this challenge will be so good for me!

I need to cut loose, let the words flow, get the inner critic out of my ear, and fight the urge to quit. This year I need to take better advantage of all the tools they offer to help you achieve success. There are chat rooms, web badges, word counters, places to sign up writing buddies so you can keep each other motivated, there is merchandise you can purchase, and even a procrastination station!

I am hoping my dear blog is not too negatively affected by my participation as I am already pressed for blog time, but this is very important to me so I will press on. Care to join in the fun?

p.s. the fun begins November 1st (gulp! that's only a few days away)
"Writing is easy:  All you do is sit staring at a blank sheet of paper 
until drops of blood form on your forehead."  ~ Gene Fowler

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

By Golly

It's Wednesday and while I considered eeking out of a post today
or making life easy with a "Wordless Wednesday" post,
By golly,
I actually have time today
and lots of words to share.

My blog has been quiet the past few days
ironically enough because my life
has been anything but quiet!

Today I share with you a Wordy Wednesday
filled with words describing
what has been keeping my blog quiet.

By golly, it's been a busy past few days
filled with...
pumpkin patches
movie watching
tea drinking
heating pads
pumpkin carving

field trips
truck buying
pumpkin carving

making new friends
60 mph wind gusting
friend supporting
story telling
blog reading
laundry folding

What new, wonderful, interesting words have been filling your days?

Saturday, October 23, 2010


I wonder why I didn't find this amazing song and performance sooner?
No matter!
I am thrilled to have found it now.
Will be on my iPod and etched in my brain soon.

Have a blessed weekend.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Happiness Continued!

When I was very young I kept a diary.
As I grew older, I grew closer to those pages.
They were safe, they were available, they were a dumping ground.
It was a private playground for my adolescent mind.
Filled with happiness, heartbreak, good times and secrets, my diary was my closest friend.
I wrote, I was honest with myself, I was real.

Life became difficult, confusing, scary, downright mean.

I lost trust.
Trust in myself, trust in others.
I grew up real fast.

My beloved diary changed.
It became a possession.
Something to hide. Something of shame.

Re-visiting the pages made me realize how silly I was,
how juvenile my thoughts and feelings were.
How embarrassing and ridiculously silly a child I was.

I burned that diary.

Many decades have gone by.
I have grown. I have learned.
I have mourned for my lost childhood,
my harshness toward myself.

I no longer live in survival mode.

All these years later, I still have an unhealthy addiction to journals/diaries.
Seeing a beautiful journal I would long to own it,
hold it, have a relationship with it.
I would purchase them
desperately wanting to mark the pages
but I could not.

What if I wrecked it?
What if I wrote something stupid?
What if my handwriting sucks?
What if someone reads it?
What if I can't get real due to fear of exposure?
What if...

It was paralyzing.
Many journals were purchased,
many were gifted away.

 (a few of the many journals I have acquired over the years including the one I made!)

I don't tell you this to depress you or sound dreary or pathetic.
Quite the contrary.
I am being reborn!!!


Now I turn over a new leaf!!!!
Remember my post from Monday?

I am so excited about my new journal!!!!
I could SCREAM!!!!!!

is all about getting down and dirty with yourself.
Digging into pages, 
being creative,
being real,
having fun!

There are prompts for every page like...
...glue random newspaper page here
...drip something here sticky things here
...fill this page with circles

Her ideas are more on the creative side
than your average wordy journal.
All the better!
That's what I want.
That's what I crave!

Letting it all out.
Being fearless.
Allowing creativity
and honesty
and fun
into every crevice life has to offer.

What a wonderful life tool
this journal will be.

I would use the word homework, but then I probably wouldn't do it!
Same reaction.

How about

That sounds like fun!
My new playground!

I hope to share some playground experiences with you in the future.
After all, that would be good practice in trusting again.

Oh Happy, Happy Day!!!!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

You Will Never Find Me List-less

Having trouble getting into the blog groove lately.
My fibro is flaring and I'm suffering something fierce!
Anyone out there with fibro?
Man, would I love to talk to you!

Anywho, Amy from Artsyville has saved the day
by giving me something to blog about today.

I'm a list-a-holic.
I have so many lists running rampant in my home
I need a list to keep track of my lists!
It's a sickness, really, but one I have found no cure for.
Truth be told? 
I enjoy them :)

The two tablets to the right
are a couple of the ongoing lists
that are milling about my desk.
Sadly, the lists are not just the pages that are showing their faces,
but many pages before are covered in list matter as well.
The Oh So Colorful list to the left
was made especially for this fine Tuesday List posting.

This would all sound more coherent if it weren't for the 
To-do list in my head
that is blocking my train of thought
as it sits untouched today
again due to the fibro.

Seriously, anyone? 
Anyone else deal with the mind-sucking,
body depleting,
frustrating condition of fibromyalsia?

Think I'll add that to one of my "to-do" lists.

+ find fibro support group and resources

(p.s. I've been a follower of Artsyville for some time
and thoroughly enjoy every minute spent there.)


My 12 y/o son spotted my list for today and wanted to do the same.
How brilliantly splendid!!!
I love inspiration and it's that much more beautiful
passed on
and on
and on!

Here is B's list...
Thank you Amy, for starting Tuesday's List.
Thank you all who have visited.
Do you have a list you would like to share?

Monday, October 18, 2010

Monday's Happiness

What's making me happy this Monday?
Simple things.

Like this vase.

(and the beautiful age cracks inside)

which I purchased at an antique sale for only
to hold
these awesome Sharpies©

to start
this book

which is a gift I purchased for myself!!!!
(back of book pictured here scribed by me)

which you can find out how to purchase HERE.

I'm terribly excited to have found the book on a recent trip.
I have known of Keri's blog and book
(actually, she has many awesome books)
for some time but try hard to curb
any online charging as it is bad for the budget.  :(

But to run across it in person?

Well, that must be a sign, 

Let's ask Lennon.

He says, "Go for it Baby!"
That's good enough for me!

(more about the book/journal tomorrow... please stay tuned!)

Wednesday, October 13, 2010


I've been stuck dealing with an energy vampire lately.
This vampire is coming at me with very strong negativity.
The attacks are becoming more frequent and longer lasting.
I am fighting the negativity with positivity.

Yesterday, I was wearing thin.
The attack was fervent.
My weapon was weakening and I was being pulled to the dark side.
In the end, I won but was worn way down.

Today I am look outside at the sunshine,
the colors, the beauty, the energy.
I am recharging my positivity reservoir
and preparing for another attack.

I am also hoping the attacker has found his way to the light.
Perhaps in taking my energy,
the attacker has stored some and replaced the negative
with the hijacked positive.

It will be a glorious day if I can keep my positive energy.

How about you?
Need a refill?
Look at these and drink it up!

Positive or negative.
No brainer.
I choose positivity!!!!

Monday, October 11, 2010

Here You Go Folks!

A small glimpse into my twisted sense of humor. Couldn't help myself!!! Lennon (the cat) has adopted my printer as his place to "hang" while I'm at my desk. He likes to be close to me.  :)
Today, I needed my printer for photocopying. Lennon didn't like this idea. That meant losing his hangout. He messed with my papers, played with the tray, tried to climb on top of the documents I was trying to photocopy. At one point, the glass was bare and he decided to jump up and take a bath. Naturally, I took advantage of the situation.

Ha ha ha ha ha!!!! I photocopied his derriere! and he just sat there! Holy Crap! I was laughing so hard. HA! Maybe a little office joke + a little humiliation at having his hind end posted on the web will teach him to stay off my printer!

..... two minutes later....

Then again, maybe not.

Friday, October 8, 2010

This Moment...

Inspired by SouleMama.
In her words - "{this moment} - A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember."

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Birthday List

For my birthday I was going to gift myself with a list. I am a chronic list maker
so it should be no problem to write out a simple little list.
Ends up, this list of mine was quite the challenge.
I turned 39 with an incomplete list.

The list? 

40 by 40
(yup! a to-do list of things to accomplish by my 40th birthday)

I thought if I gifted it to myself for my 39th birthday, I would have a whole year to complete the list.
"The list" will be used as a motivational tool to act on what I want from life. 
To be able to say I have done "x", "y" and "z" by the age of forty would be fulfilling.
I would enter my 40's feeling accomplished
and ready to take on 40+ more years!

Should I psycho-analyze the fact that I failed to complete the list in time?
I'll just mark off number 7!
One down, thirty-nine to go!

At least now I know what to add as #1!

1. finish my 40 by 40 list
2. get in shape
3. visit the west coast
4. conquer NaNoWriMo
5. express fearlessly
6. re-learn algebra
7. keep my sense of humor
8. practice yoga/meditation regularly
9. journal regularly
10. thank-you project
11. experiment with henna tats
12. master my breath
13. photo shoot
14. visit 1/2 dozen authentic delis
15. take better care of my Etsy shop
16. have steady income
17. make time for my art
18. get published (again)
40. accept and embrace 40

Monday, October 4, 2010

the perfect protest

Stand in line, raise your sign and march, march, march.
If you are not perfect, join the protest!
Author Brene Brown has come up with  another brilliant
self-help book.
This one Titled "The Gifts of Imperfection"
You can learn more about her 
protest to perfection

I knew this was one protest I had to join as...
me too...
I... am not perfect.

I (like a lot of others joining the protest) tend to swear (a lot)
I don't always say nice things about myself
I hate doing my hair so I am always wash and go
I have big feet
I sweat (a lot)
I get angry more often than I like 
I talk too much
I have enough self-doubt I could donate some
I self-sabbotage
I can't say "no" very well (but I'm working on it)
I live in fear
I live mostly in t-shirts
I have loud, sometimes embarrassing laughs
I laugh out loud at things others don't find funny
I worry too much about what others might think
I am a perfectionist living in a home with slobs which makes me feel crazy at times
I'm a control freak
I'm short and will never be model thin
I can belch with the best of them
I find fart jokes hilarious
I tend to get defensive and judge people
I tried to own a dog but couldn't do it
I am chemically sensitive
I love kissing but don't get kissed much
I grab my husband's ass in public
I am completely freaked out by spiders

Then again...

I am a giving person
I am full of love
I wish more than anything for world peace and acceptance (yup, I'm one of those)
I have good skin
I love nature and take good care of her
I am an awesome mom
I am learning and growing in who I am all the time and strive to be a better person daily
I help people in need (even the old lady in the store)
I am aware of others feelings and try to never hurt anyone
I am in love with love
I dance freely in my home when the mood strikes and teach my children to do the same
I am creative
I can cook
I can hold a tune
I am neither overweight nor underweight to any extreme
I love to travel
I love to read
I know how to speak pig latin fluently  ;)
I am clean, courteous and conscientious
I am friendly
I have good hair
I love mornings and wake up cheery
I have a good sense of humor
I'm not afraid to have my picture taken in my pj's!

Friday, October 1, 2010


The man really knows how to use his hands!
did I just say that out loud?

I meant to say...
my husband is soooo talented!
Get your heads out of the gutters!

(some carvings for sale, some now spoken for)

Darling Husband
God gave you a gift
I am so glad you are finally using it.
The day I met you
is the day I knew
there really is good in the world
and some of that good is meant for me
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