Tuesday, March 19, 2013


My last post was on the heavy side. Since I like to mix things up, I thought I would post another funny to counter the heavy. Today is March 19th. The windchill outside is below zero. Spring, WHERE ARE YOU!!! In the spirit of positive thinking, I am holding faith that spring is mere days away. In honor of spring, I have been researching planting and gardening ideas. 

I have a son who loves cactus and succulents. He actually collects them, or at least tries. Believe it or not, we have a cactus eating cat! You heard that right. My cat eats all plants, including cactus. This has caused my plant loving household to become plant barren as he has gotten deathly sick off of several of the plants he ingested. Being plant lovers without the ability to grow houseplants is depressing. Being plant lovers not able to have houseplants in a state that has an outside growing season of what feels like two months is even more depressing! Still, we do what we can and that means grow as much as we can while we can!

I was researching plants for my garden, flowers for Darling Daughter's Fairy Flower Garden, and hardy plants for my cactus/succulent loving son. I came upon a site that had these awesome spherical succulent collections. I became intrigued, engulfed, obsessed in figuring out how to grow some for our patio this year. I was so fully engaged in the process of learning how to make them, I didn't notice the name they were given. Actually, I had read the name many times, it just never struck my funny bone until I stepped away from the page to get some coffee and sat back down. At that moment my perception of the name changed and I had a laugh-out-loud-alone-with-self moment. I had spent the last twenty minutes with my face inches away from Succulent Balls! Ha ha ha! (click link for awesome garden idea)

Get it? 


Did you click the link?

Now do you get it?

Never mind. 
(sporting sheepish grin as I slink away)

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Look Up

I rarely put myself first and am realizing how unhealthy that can be. My conditioning taught me to be a people pleasing caretaker. I have always put everyone else first and it has hurt me severely. It's not that I wanted to be last, I just couldn't figure out how to put myself first without hurting someone else. Someone wins, someone loses. Me? Or them? Conditioning taught me to self-sacrifice.

What a terrible dilemma! Either I put myself first and feel selfish for hurting others, or I put everyone else first and I suffer. That is a no win situation. 

I'm learning. 

Being able to put yourself first is important in life. You are the most important person in your life. Without you, you have no life. Putting yourself first can be empowering and liberating. It is also how you get ahead. Putting yourself first is good, unless done at the cost of others. Then you are acting out of ego. You are saying "I am better than, more important than." You are creating hurt.

If done correctly, everyone benefits.
what is the correct way?

I think I may have figured it out!

Each one of us must put ourselves first in order to thrive and survive.

Putting yourself first means you must cast off others. Use them as stepping stones. Use them to build a wall so you can find your rightful place at the top. Right?


Try looking at it as a race. Place yoursef first. 
grab the hands of those around you. Walk shoulder to shoulder, together, in the lead. If you get to a point where you feel the energy or need to surge ahead? Don't drop hands, pull them along! Set an example. Lead the way. Share the empowered feeling of being first. It will pay off if you stumble or tire. By that time, the bond between hands will be strong and it will be you who will be carried along until you have regained strength.

We all must work together in order to win the race.
The Human Race.

Look up. What do you see? Vastness. Eternity.
Does it make you feel small?
I'm sure it does if you stand alone.

Stand together.
Walk together.
Run if you have to.
Just don't let go.
If you feel yourself slipping?
I got you babe.

I am taking this moment in time to recognize that I have never put myself first. I am also realizing that I need to start. In doing so, I vow to hang on to the hands of all those I love, leaving no one behind and adding the hands that reach out to me. In putting myself first I will grow in self-esteem, in empowerment and in self. I will set an example and pass the feeling on through all the hands I hold.

Monday, March 11, 2013

I Miss You!

I miss you!!!
I can't seem to find the time or frame of mind to post lately.
Taking care of taxes and no fun stuff.
Waiting for time to play.

I'm keeping my eye on all of you.
Will be back to play again real soon.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Prideful Share

Weeks worth of emotions, thoughts and words are ruminating in my brain, their current consistency too thick to plate (upon the page). With a bit more time to marinatee they will become tender and more favorable a dish to pass.

For the time being, I am sharing a poem written by my eleven year old son. Bloody brilliant if you ask me! This mom is so impressed!

Element Poetry
by Carter Retzlaff

Shiny, rarity
Melting, freezing, bending
Jewelry, electricity, dentistry, bedrock
Dissolving, reflecting, shaping
Valued, attractive

 Poetry © Carter Retzlaff

(I had to ask what "Au" meant. It's the elemental abbreviation for gold on the periodic table. He is already learning chemistry, a subject never presented in my education.)
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