Thursday, January 20, 2011

Time

 
Time is the coin of your life.  It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent.  Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.  ~Carl Sandburg


Time is what we want most, but... what we use worst.  ~Willaim Penn



I've been reflecting on time lately. I look at my kids and see how fast time seems to fly. I wait for my tea water to boil and feel like it is taking forever. I rush around like a crazy woman trying to get a million things done in a day. I have a few minutes to myself and I am a deer in headlights unable to move, trying to figure out what direction to take.


I have been wanting to carve out some time for myself. Me. Alone. In a house with five people who depend on me every second of every day. Sometimes the demands are suffocating, causing me glimpses of an imaginary life where I break free, get in the car and drive, drive, drive. Far away where I can find solitude. Just for a moment. Then I will return. I promise.


Just the thought brings loneliness and guilt as I don't want to lose a single minute with these precious beings that share my dwelling. My mind flashes to the future when they grow and part ways with "home" and I get instantly sad and reminisce. I cling to the present desperate for it to remain as it is. How can I miss my children when they're right here? Trust me. I'm capable!


Time. A slippery commodity. As I type this I am being bombarded with young voices preparing for school. Waiting until they leave to post would prove fruitless as baby will be dropped off and demanding my time. Noon will see my four returning as it is a half day, end of quarter, semester. End. Another time line complete. My focus wanes.


Last night I tried to take shots of the moon. It was full and bright, huge and gorgeous. I don't know how to set my camera to take a good shot nor the time to learn. I shot anyways. If I had more time, it would be a better picture. Instead it is what it is. A big white hole in the night sky which actually turned out to be pretty cool considering the shadow effect. Can you see it? To the right of the moon? (if I find the time, I will play with the image and see if I can get it to pop)




I'm off to drive the kids to school and kiss them to pieces.


This moment. Right now. What are you doing with your time?

9 comments:

John said...

What a great post and a great photograph. Talking about time remninds me of what is probably my most favourite TV series "Babylon 5". So filled with wisdom and adventure.I think it was season 3, when a "First One" an immortal called Porien?, said something along the lines of that time was such a wonderful gift (as in mortality), for we then learn to appreciate how precious each moment is.

Caroline said...

Oh boy....time...that illusive thing that ticks away in my head. Wonderful thoughtful post.

roseisrose said...

thank you for this post and reminding me of how much time I do waste... time I can't get back. I love that first quote-- how true is that? wow.
you're pretty darn awesome my friend. thanks for letting me in to see your wonderful thoughts ♥

G-Pride Farm said...

Oh, Lucy Lynn, I shared that same moon with you that night. It was so beautiful, and after the snow we got that morning, the glow was just out of this world. I took several minutes that night, several times, to bundle up and spend time outside just looking at the world under that moon around me. I really think I spent my time wisely that night. You did too it looks like. Did you feel it, the draw?

Inner Toddler said...

I'm rereading some old posts of mine and the comments that make me so giddy and yours are some of the best. Time and I have a love hate thing going right now. xo

julochka said...

i'm baking red velvet cupcakes.

i think they're perfection.

they're for my tomorrow 10-year-old.

time flies.

especially when you're having fun.

xox,
/j

Jaime said...

Time is so funny....it can fly by, making you want to hold on for dear life, and scrape as much out of it as you can before it disappears...yet, it can take forever for water to boil! lol! Love that observation.

Lenetté said...

Loveliness. I get all of it. I used to ask my daughter to not grow up and she always used to answer that she had to. :)

Love the moon shot. I noticed the reflection right away. :)

Lenetté said...

Oh and what I'm doing with my time right at this moment is trying to catch up on some blog reading while I suffer with insomnia.

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