I chose my word for the year.
Actually, it chose me.
Earlier on I had a different word.
One I picked. A good one.
An obviously-not-set-in-stone one.
One day I took a shower.
In the shower I asked for guidance.
So much I want to do, learn, experience and accomplish.
So much that needs to get done but never does.
It seems quite impossible due to the million directions I am pulled daily.
The distractions, the clutter and mess of large family living.
The crazy pace that lives seem to take.
Practically pleading for an answer
a word came to me.
One word.
Focus
Makes sense.
I tried the word on.
Ran some errands.
At the store, a book would catch my eye.
Stop me in my tracks.
I started to page through.
The word came again.
Focus
Grocery store.
I have a list.
There's a sale.
Start looking over sale items.
Not on list.
Focus
Driving in the car.
Mind running a million miles an hour.
Almost miss my turn.
Focus
I kept the word in the front of my mind for days.
Tried it on for size.
Focus
It seemed to keep me on task.
Perhaps this is the perfect word for 2011.
But what should I be focusing on?
Is that really the best word?
After all, I replaced my original word 'compassion' with 'focus'.
Was that the best choice?
Should one really give up compassion for focus?
Can't I have both?
I'm already compassionate, do I need to work harder at it?
Obviously what I need to do and seem unable to do is...
Oh drat. There goes that silly brain of mine again.
Question. Analyze. Doubt.
No. No. No.
Just FOCUS!
(obviously I need it)
I sat with the word for weeks.
Played with it.
Stroked it.
and finally accepted it.
My word of the year.
Focus
I woke up today (or rather was woken up after five hours of sleep).
Focus
I had images in my head of a creative way to portray my word here.
Focus
Couldn't find the blocks I wanted to use.
Daughter begging me to help her with a project.
Ask her for patience.
Focus
Decided on a different approach.
Husband made me sit down and eat.
Daughter still pulling me toward her project.
Focus
Boys start waking up.
Cat needs shot. Still won't eat. Offer treats and love.
Focus
Set everything up to take picture for blog.
Camera battery is dead. Shit!
Focus.
I'll post without picture.
Walk back upstairs.
Daughter now in tears because I will not drop what I'm doing to help.
I drop what I'm doing and start doing what she wants.
Shit! Stop myself and ask once again for patience.
"I'm almost done honey."
Focus
Here I am. Finishing what I set out to do.
It took me well over an hour.
There were many distractions.
I was being pulled.
The post is done.
It wasn't the outcome I intended.
But here I sit.
Finished.
Focused.
Off to help Darling Daughter with her project.
I bet she lets me focus!
*wink*
9 comments:
i know that word well, and it's an amazing one. it was the word i chose two years ago....first i had see, then focus....all having to do with life and my camera. and by god, it was a great word. it didn't always work when i wanted it too, but it's still one that's close to my heart....
have a blast with it....you will wear it well. i just know you will !
Never a dull moment in your home Lynn. Peace!
Hummm, I think when you got the Mom handbook, your's didn't include the word multi-task and me time. I once hung a sign on the back of my kitchen chair, my girls were very young, on the sign it said, "Mom's". The definition was explained to my girls. Mom's-when Mom is sitting here, do not bother her. She will be done shortly. You know what, it worked, at least while they were younger.
I am glad you have your word for the year, and I hope you are able to focus and those around you give you the same consideration to you, that you show them with patience. Humm, maybe you should assign patience to your family for the year. Might help out. Take care and be good to yourself. You deserve it.
LMAO! Focus pretty much hit you across the head and you still fought it. You sound like me. And I laughed because I came to your blog just as I was thinking 'I wanna do this and try that and this and that and and..." And what do I pull up? Your post on Focus. Tee hee. So Focus dear one and just remember, if Focus is kicking your butte remember its sister-word Mookyper which reminds you to throw on the striped tights, colorful tops and twirl until you drop laughing. At the least, it'll keep your family at arm's length. Tee hee! And just remember, you're not alone. If you need to talk I'll be the one struggling under the weight of 'love'.
Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank you for the reminder Elena! I will have to blog about my backup word tomorrow! Oh how I needed the reminder. ;)
Nice post!!!!!!!!!! You've really captured the essence of why moms can't seem to focus when the children are at home.
Good luck, mama!!
What a great word! You will be inspired...you will be tested...but this word will be such a great guide. I wish you a very happy and focus-filled New Year :)
happy new year & cheers to how your focus will gift you in it.
hee hee...I love the way your mind works..and the way you translate it into words. Focus is a fantastic word...it encompasses so many things, and no doubt, will take you on a few adventures this year. I wonder what it will bring you?
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